managing meltdowns, self-regulation, managing emotions, kids, children, parents, teachers, overstimulation, validate feelings, calming strategies, de-escalation, triggers Managing Meltdowns As both a parent and a teacher, I’ve applied many of these strategies with success. However, every child is unique, and what works for one may not be effective for another. If your child experiences frequent meltdowns, it’s helpful to identify specific triggers, such as transitions, hunger, fatigue, or overstimulation. Keeping a journal to track these patterns—as well as the strategies that succeed or fail—can provide valuable insights. During a meltdown, it’s important to remember that the child is not in a rational state, making it an unproductive time for reasoning or lengthy discussions. A simple and supportive phrase like, “How can I help?” can sometimes diffuse the situation. Once the child has calmed down, revisiting the event can be beneficial. Hours later or even the next day, approach the conversation with a calm, neutral tone. Ask open-ended questions, validate their feelings, and collaboratively identify triggers and potential coping strategies. Focus on solutions to help them navigate similar situations in the future. Let them know you’re proud of their effort to reflect and grow, and take this opportunity to strengthen your connection with them. Graphic courtesy of Youth Mental Health Canada

Free Resources for Students - Educators - Parents - General Lifestyle and Wellness , podcasts, free websites, motivation, free meditation, nutrition, free vegan recipes Free Resources: Lifestyle & Wellness Parents Educators Students Articles by Me Reclaiming You: 8 Week Challenge Checklist - A printable checklist to go alongside the Reclaiming You 8 part blog series. This series is for the women who've spent years holding it all together and are finally ready to hold space for themselves. Reflection Questions for Reclaiming You - Reflection prompts from Reclaiming You, an 8-part blog series for women who are ready to live with more truth, intention, and self-compassion. You can find the full series under the Blog tab. Effective Communication Strategies: Attachment Styles & Crucial Conversations Check out my Facebook Group, Busy Women Finding Balance , a supportive space for women to share struggles, wins, and practical strategies for reducing stress and creating balance in our busy lives. As a bonus for joining, you’ll get free access to my 18-page goal-setting workbook, Beyond the To-Do List! It’s designed to help you reflect, prioritize, and take action—one step at a time (you can find it in the Files section). Some of My Favourite Books Untamed by Glennon Doyle (I recommend this for every woman who wants to wake up and rediscover her true self) Heart Minded: How to Hold Yourself and Others in Love by Sarah Blondin How To Do The Work by Dr. Nicole LePera A New Earth: Awakening to Your Life's Purpose by Eckhart Tolle The 7 Habits of Highly Effective People by Stephen Covey (This is an oldie but a goodie that I always find myself coming back to.) Some of My Favourite Websites Insight Timer - Can also download the app. I have paid for a Plus membership, but there are many free meditations and guides. Mel Robbins - Make It Happen - free motivation workshop and workbook Oh She Glows - One of my go to spots for tasty, healthy meals. The recipes are all vegan (I'm not vegan but enjoy everything I make from here) Some of My Favourite Podcasts Live Awake with Sarah Blondin (She changed my life!) Unlocking Us with Brené Brown 10% Happier with Dan Harris In particular, this episode featuring Tara Brach: A Counterintuitive Strategy for Navigating Tumultuous Times This Diary Of A CEO episode about stress featuring neuroscientist Tara Swart Click here to contact me and start a conversation about how I can support you on your wellness journey!

Structured Literacy Tools - Decodable Texts - Math Games - Lessons Plans Activities - Ebook Library, free resources, free websites, language, students, teachers, parents, educators, education, Free Resources: Lifestyle & Wellness Parents Educators Students Some of My Favourite Websites for Language Structured literacy tools from UFLI Foundations Toolbox Decodable texts from Flyleaf Publishing Collection of videos featuring celebrities reading stories from Storyline Online Some of My Favourite Websites for Math Math games from Tang Math Virtual math manipulatives from Toy Theatre Math games by grade with Math Playground Math drill games with Tux Math Math challenges with nrich Some of My Overall Favourite Websites for Students Lessons, games, activities and information from TVO Kids Lessons, videos and games from PBS Learning Media Worksheets and resources organized by grade and topic from K5 Learning Extensive library of e-books, activities and resources from Oxford Owl Also check out the Free Resources for Educators. Click here to connect and discuss personalized resources and strategies to support your educational journey.

Contact me for a free and complimentary 30 minute consultation, connect, goal setting, conversation, support, guidance, customized resources I offer a complimentary 30 minute consultation to discuss your goals and explore how I can best support you. This initial conversation will help us determine the right approach to meet your needs and answer any questions you may have. After the consultation, my rate is $50 per hour. This includes time spent connecting via video conference, telephone, or text, as well as any work required to gather or create customized resources. Payments can be made using e-transfer, PayPal or credit card. To get started, please send me an email using the on-line form. Share a bit about your goals and how I can help, and we’ll arrange a time to chat. I look forward to connecting with you! Also, feel free to email me if you have any questions or to request my free workbook: Beyond the To-Do List , a goal-setting guide to help you reflect, prioritize, and take action—one step at a time. Growing Hearts and Minds barb.elvidge@gmail.com Submit Thanks for submitting!

Favorite podcasts and websites - Free Articles For Reading Writing Social Skills Kindergarten, free resources, helping your child with reading and math, managing meltdowns, outdoor activities Free Resources: Lifestyle & Wellness Parents Educators Students Articles by Me Effective Communication Strategies: Attachment Styles & Crucial Conversations Promoting Social Skills Development Getting Ready for Kindergarten Helping Your Child with Reading Helping your Child with Math Strategies to Manage Meltdowns Check out my Facebook Group, Busy Women Finding Balance , a supportive space for women to share struggles, wins, and practical strategies for reducing stress and creating balance in our busy lives. As a bonus for joining, you’ll get free access to my 18-page goal-setting workbook, Beyond the To-Do List! It’s designed to help you reflect, prioritize, and take action—one step at a time (you can find it in the Files section). Some Of My Favourite Websites Outdoor Activities for Kids from Run Wild My Child Resources, blog posts and podcasts from The Measured Mom Zero to Three offers a resources tailored for parents, covering topics like child development, early learning, and parenting strategies. Browse a variety of topics at Peaceful Parent, Happy Kids Some of My Favourite Podcasts Good Inside with Dr. Becky We Can Do Hard Things episode with guest Dr. Becky Also check out the Free Resources for Students and Educators. Click here to contact me and start a conversation about how I can provide valuable tools and support you as a parent!

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communication strategies, attachment styles, crucial conversations, communicating with partner, couples counselling, improve relationship, marriage counselling, connecting with partner, navigating conflict, setting boundaries, help with housework, validation Effective Communication Strategies: Attachment Styles & Crucial Conversations Understanding Attachment Styles in Communication Attachment styles, formed in childhood, shape how we connect with others express our needs and handle conflict, especially in romantic relationships. By understanding these styles, we can improve communication and strengthen relationships. Communicating with an Avoidant Partner People with avoidant attachment value independence and may withdraw during emotional conversations. Here are ten things a secure partner can say to foster connection and set boundaries: “I respect your need for space, but I also need to feel connected. Let’s find a balance that works for both of us.” “I notice you tend to pull away when we have serious conversations. Can we agree on a way to check in that feels comfortable for both of us?” "I don’t expect you to be emotionally available all the time, but I do need to feel like I matter to you. Can we find small ways to show that?" “I understand that expressing emotions is hard for you. I appreciate any effort you make, and I’ll do my best to listen without judgment.” “When you withdraw, I feel distant from you. Could we set a time to reconnect after you’ve had space?” “I want us to be a team. How can I support you in a way that feels good for you?” “I’m not asking for constant closeness, just reassurance that we are in this together.” “I value our relationship and want to work through things with you. What’s a way we can communicate that feels safe for you?” “I need emotional connection to feel secure, just like you need space to feel safe. Let’s talk about how we can meet both of our needs.” “I love and appreciate you, and I want to make sure we are both feeling fulfilled in this relationship.” Communicating with an Anxious Partner Anxiously attached individuals often seek reassurance and fear abandonment. Here are ten things a secure partner can say to improve connection while setting healthy boundaries: “I love you, and I am here for you. You don’t have to worry about that.” “It’s okay to have feelings, and I want to support you. Can we talk about what you need in a way that feels good for both of us?” “I understand that uncertainty can feel scary for you. Let’s talk about ways to build trust and security together.” “I will do my best to reassure you, but I also need space sometimes. Let’s find a balance.” "If you ever feel unsure about us, please talk to me. I’d rather reassure you than have you worry alone." “I care about you deeply, and I want to respond in a way that makes you feel safe. How can we communicate better?” “I am committed to you, and I also need time to take care of myself. Taking space doesn’t mean I’m leaving.” “Your feelings matter to me, and I want to understand them. But I also want to make sure we both feel heard.” “I appreciate your passion and emotional depth. Let’s work on ways to express our needs without overwhelming each other.” “I love you, and I want us to have a strong relationship. Let’s build habits that make us both feel secure.” Applying Crucial Conversations in Relationships In the book Crucial Conversations: Tools for Talking When Stakes Are High by Patterson, Grenny, McMillan, and Switzler, the core idea is that high-stakes conversations require awareness, emotional regulation, and clear communication to maintain both mutual respect and understanding. The guidelines can be applied in all types of crucial conversation, however the examples I am providing here are focusing on more intimate relationships. When discussing difficult topics, keep in mind three key elements: What I Want – Be clear about your needs and goals. Before entering a crucial conversation, it’s essential to get clear on your own needs and desired outcomes. Ask yourself: What is my main goal in this conversation? What do I really want for myself, the other person, and the relationship? Am I focusing on winning the argument, or am I aiming for a meaningful resolution? A common pitfall in tough conversations is becoming too focused on being “right”, which can escalate conflict. Instead, the book suggests staying curious and open to learning rather than proving a point. What the Other Person Needs – Acknowledge their perspective. Effective conversations require mutual respect and psychological safety, so the other person feels heard. To do this: Actively listen without interrupting. Ask open-ended questions to understand their thoughts and emotions. Watch for emotional cues—if they seem defensive or shut down, it may indicate they feel threatened or unheard. Instead of assuming their intentions, state what you observe and invite them to share their perspective. Example: Instead of "You never listen to me!" Try "I feel like my concerns aren’t being heard. Can we talk about how we can communicate better?" How to Maintain the Relationship – Ensure communication builds trust and connection. Difficult conversations can quickly turn into arguments if people feel attacked, unheard, or dismissed. To maintain the relationship: Check for safety—if emotions run high, pause and reset before continuing. Use contrasting statements to avoid misunderstandings. Examples: "I’m not saying you’re wrong, I just want to share my perspective so we can find a solution together." "I’m not saying you can’t spend money on things you enjoy, and I’m not trying to control you. What I do want is for us to have a plan so that we can meet our financial goals together." "I don’t want you to feel unvalued or think I don’t appreciate your effort. What I do want is to find a way to make this process smoother for both of us." Stay flexible—if your approach isn’t working, be willing to adjust. The book highlights that when people feel safe, they’re more likely to stay in dialogue instead of shutting down or becoming defensive. This is where the “STATE” model can help: S hare your facts (stick to objective information). T ell your story (explain how you’re interpreting the situation). A sk for their perspective (invite them to share). T alk tentatively (stay open instead of making assumptions). E ncourage testing (work together to find a solution). By balancing clarity, empathy, and respect, you can navigate difficult conversations while strengthening, rather than damaging, relationships. Navigating a Conflict with a Partner Scenario: Your partner often spends long hours at work, and you feel neglected. You don’t want to start a fight, but you need to express your feelings and work toward a solution. How to Apply the Three Key Considerations: What I Want: I want to feel more connected and valued in our relationship. What They Need: My partner might feel pressure at work and need support rather than blame. Maintaining the Relationship: I want to communicate in a way that encourages change, not defensiveness. How to Say It Using the STATE Model: Share your facts: "I’ve noticed that over the past few weeks, we’ve barely had any quality time together because of your long work hours." Tell your story: "I’m feeling disconnected, and I miss spending time with you." Ask for their perspective: "How are you feeling about our time together lately?" Talk tentatively: "I know work is demanding, and I appreciate how hard you work for our family. I’m wondering if we can find a way to set aside some uninterrupted time together?" Encourage testing: "Would it help if we planned one evening a week where we do something together, just the two of us?" Why This Works: Instead of accusing your partner (which could trigger defensiveness), you focus on expressing your feelings while creating a collaborative solution. Setting a Boundary Around Housework in a Marriage Scenario: You feel overwhelmed by managing most of the household chores while your partner doesn’t contribute as much. You don’t want to nag, criticize or create tension but need to set a boundary to ensure a more balanced division of responsibilities. How to Apply the Three Key Considerations: What I Want: I want more help around the house so I don’t feel exhausted and resentful. What They Need: They may not realize how much I’m doing or might feel unsure about what needs to be done. Maintaining the Relationship: I want to express my needs without making them feel criticized or defensive. How to Say It Using the STATE Model: Share your facts: "I’ve noticed that I’m handling most of the housework lately, and it’s starting to feel overwhelming." Tell your story: "I’m feeling exhausted, and I don’t want to start resenting the imbalance. I really need us to share these responsibilities more." Ask for their perspective: "How do you see our division of housework right now? Do you feel like it’s fair?" Talk tentatively: "I know we both have a lot going on, and I appreciate everything you do. I’d love to find a way to make this feel more balanced for both of us." Encourage testing: "Would you be open to sitting down and dividing up tasks so we both feel supported?" If Your partner is dismissive or resistant and responds with something like, “I already help when I can” or “Just tell me what you need,” you can reinforce your boundary by saying: "I appreciate that, but I don’t want to have to ask every time—I’d love for us to have a plan where we both take responsibility for certain tasks so it doesn’t all fall on me." "I know you’re busy too, but I need a partner to keep our home running smoothly. Can we find a fair way to divide things up?" To ensure follow-through, suggest specific actions: "How about we each take responsibility for certain daily and weekly tasks? For example, I’ll handle laundry and meal planning, and you can take care of dishes and garbage." "Would you be open to alternating certain tasks each week so it feels more equal?" "Can we check in every Sunday to adjust if needed?" Why This Works: It frames the conversation around teamwork rather than blame. It acknowledges their perspective while standing firm on your needs. It shifts the focus from a one-time complaint to an ongoing, shared responsibility. Setting a Boundary With a Partner that Needs a Lot of Validation Scenario: Your partner has an anxious attachment style and often seeks reassurance, especially when you are busy or need some alone time. You are feeling overwhelmed and want to set a boundary around personal space while still maintaining connection and security in your relationship. How to Apply the Three Key Considerations: What I Want: I want a healthy balance between personal space and connection while reassuring my partner that I love them. What They Need: They crave security and reassurance in our relationship. They fear distance means rejection or disinterest. Maintaining the Relationship: I want to express my needs without triggering their fears and instead foster understanding and trust. How to Say It Using the STATE Model: Share your facts: "Lately, I’ve noticed that when I take time for myself—whether it’s reading, working, or just decompressing—you sometimes seem upset or worried that I’m pulling away." Tell your story: "I want you to know that when I need time alone, it’s not because I’m upset with you or don’t want to be around you. I truly value our relationship, and having time to recharge actually helps me show up as a better partner." Ask for their perspective: “Have you been feeling like I’m pulling away? What’s going through your mind when I take space?" Talk tentatively: "I could be wrong, but it seems like when I take personal time, it might make you feel anxious. Is that right?" Encourage testing: "I want us to find a way that works for both of us. Maybe we can come up with a small check-in routine so you feel reassured while I still get my needed alone time. What do you think?" Why This Works: It offers reassurance first and encourages open dialogue. It frames the boundary as a positive by explaining that personal space helps me be a better partner rather than making it sound like a punishment or rejection. It creates a collaborative solution through finding a compromise. For more strategies on improving your relationship, check out my blog: Transforming My Relationship by Transforming Myself . Final Thoughts Whether navigating different attachment styles or having crucial conversations, effective communication is key to healthier relationships. By practicing these strategies, you can create deeper connection, mutual understanding, and lasting change. Your journey matters. Let’s find your path forward—together. Click here to contact me for more personalized support!

Here are some things you can practice at home to help your child get ready for kindergarten, letter and sound recognition, number matching, school lunches, name activities, fine motor skills, problem-solving skills, washing hands, social skills, children, education, parents, teachers, early childhood education, educators Getting Ready For Kindergarten Here are some things you can practice at home to help your child get ready for kindergarten: Skills that develop personal independence: using the washroom independently, washing their hands, opening and closing their backpack and lunchbox (as well as any containers inside), putting on and taking off their shoes and coat, follow simple directions with 1 or 2 steps. Social skills: sharing, taking turns, asking for help, allowing someone else to go first, discuss feelings. Letter/sound recognition activities: watch some short, fun videos such as this Letter Factory song, pick one letter (start with the first letter in your child’s name) and discuss the sound it makes then look for it in books or objects in the environment, check out some fun printables at funlearningforkids.com that you can do with your child. Number activities: identify numbers in the environment, count a variety of objects, match numbers with pictures (see my Numbers to 10 Matching Activity freebie). Name activities: point out their name in different contexts, practice identifying their name next to a few other names of friends or family, practice tracing their name, hide a name card and have your child find it. Fine motor skills: drawing, painting, tracing, cutting with scissors, glueing with white glue and glue sticks, using tweezers to pick up small objects such as pompoms or beads. Problem-solving skills: follow your child’s interests (such as creating art, cooking, building structures, conducting science experiments or exploring nature), brainstorm ideas, ask questions, research, try using different tools or materials, discuss challenges, reflect on what went well and what you could do differently. Here is a link from the Ontario Government about Preparing Your Child for Full-Day Kindergarten.

Meal Planning - Parenting Resources - Family Goal Setting - Empathetic Support - Organization - Scheduling - Coaching - Emotional Challenges - Best Life Support for Parents With over 20 years of experience as a teacher and tutor, raising two children of my own, and volunteering with Kids Help Phone, I understand the joys and challenges of parenting. My goal is to provide the guidance and resources you need to thrive as a parent and support your family’s success. How I Can Help You I offer personalized support in the following areas: Meal Planning : Customized meal plans complete with grocery lists to simplify your busy days. Parenting Resources : Practical tools and resources for parenting, organization, and scheduling. Family Goal Setting : Help with creating actionable goals and plans for you and your family’s growth. Empathetic Coaching : A compassionate ear to listen, understand, and stand by your side while empowering you to overcome emotional challenges and create your best life. Let’s work together to make parenting more manageable and fulfilling. Click here to contact me for a free 30 minute consultation to discuss how I can support you as a parent!

Helping your child with math - Tips and support for educators, parents and students, shapes and patterns, measurement, mathematical thinking, math games, sorting, problem-solving games, real life math, money, counting Helping Your Child With Math Here are some things you can try at home to help your child improve math skills: Look for shapes and patterns at home or during daily activities. Have children help with measurement, for example when cooking, sewing, building, etc. Ask your child to explain the math skills they are working on or how they got an answer to a math question. Model different approaches to mathematical thinking. For example when counting a group of objects you could line them up, put them in groups of five or ten, or move them while you count by ones or twos. Play card, dice or board games that involve counting, adding or other math concepts. Compare and sort by height, length, weight, speed, cost, etc. Point out ways that math is part of real life as situations arise; money, music, art, construction, cooking, etc. Have tools such as a ruler, scale, calculator and measuring tape available to use to solve day to day math problems. Help your child find appropriate number and problem-solving games online. Check out these math games from Tang Math .

As a recently retired OCT (Ontario College of Teachers) teacher and lifelong learner, I am excited to bring my passion for helping others into a new role that aligns with my skills and experience. 1 Hour Session